Itchy

I have been feeling off lately, my body isn’t what it used to be. I get tired and out of breath quickly, and I seem to sleep more than usual. Going up and down the stairs is too much, so my person encourages me, You can do it! You’re almost there! Sometimes I can’t make it on my own though, and they carry me. How lucky am I?

My mom and dad; the humans I live with, have been giving me special attention, telling me how good I have been. They gave me food right from their plate yesterday, and I got to cuddle with them on the couch after. Even though I had to relieve myself a few times inside by accident, I didn’t get in trouble. I felt embarrassed, but they said it was okay, that I tried my best.

Mom has been crying a lot today, hugging me and petting my fur. I am up on the bed with her, and I try my best to make her feel better with my kisses and I wag my tail. She starts crying even harder, telling me she is sorry. I wish she wouldn’t cry, I have only ever wanted her to be happy. I hope she knows how much I love her.

Now the others are in the room, and they have treats with them! She wraps me in my favorite blanket and brings me to the car. What a day! Uninterrupted time with my people, treats and a car ride. They must love me a lot. I still don’t understand why they are so sad though. How can she be so upset when we are cuddling like this? I am usually so good at making her happy, but not today.

In the car I get to sit up front on her lap, and she showers me in kisses. She tells me that she is sorry. I want to enjoy this time, but I keep falling asleep. She is there where I wake up though, and that makes me happy. When I wake up this last time, we are in the building that usually scares me so bad, but this time I’m not left alone with the strange man. This time my people are all still with me and I feel safe.  Mom and dad, they have been there with me since before I can even remember. Some of my other people that I love are missing, but Mom says that they love me a lot and I know that.

I think I understand now, the way I have been feeling. I’m not the pup I once was, and it is taking its toll on me. I think back on my great memories with them, cuddling and going for hikes. All the different houses we lived in, and the farm animals they let me help with. I remember when I had to guard that chicken for three days while she sat on an egg, and my people were so happy when I finally came home! I was able to see my mom and dad’s children and move away, I got to meet new babies from the humans, and I have lots of other animal friends that my humans brought to live with us. I have had such a great life with them! I hope I have done a good job of loving them and making them happy.

The strange man looks at me with a sad face, and my Mom and Dad both hug me tightly, and I feel a little pinch. It doesn’t hurt much though. My sweet Mom is crying so hard and no matter how many kisses I give her she just won’t stop. I am getting tired again, and I don’t think I can fight it. It’s getting dark, but I am warm, and I feel so loved.

I can hear my Mom’s voice from far away in the darkness, I love you, sweet girl.

I sure hope they know how much I love them.

-Colleen